Thursday, March 28, 2013

Last Year With Norm

I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK, SUCKERS!!!!!!!

Going to give an update on what happened while I was gone. Hopefully I can continue to write now that I'm settled down again.

 While I have been gone:
-I didn't get a job.
-Learned how to ride a dirt bike.
-Homos have gotten their panties in a wad about getting married.
-Bought 132 scratch offs and won a total of $762.
-Went on 4 blind dates. Currently, dating no one. I'm SINGLE, hot ladies!
-Slapped a Wal-Mart greeter on the butt.
-Obama took office. I miss Ron Paul.
-Floyd got zero action.
-Dropped my cell phone in a toilet.
-Visited Paradise City where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.
 -Purchased a rottweiler. Took him back after 2 months. Didn't get my money back.
-Got 5 tickets in one police stop. For Riding a dirt bike on a road, not having a valid drivers license, speeding, not wearing a helmet, and public indecency (flipped off a school bus full of kids).
-Crapped in the woods and wiped with leaves.
-Shot an elk. -Toured 3 beer factories.
-Lost $600 on the Super Bowl.
-Ran a 5k in a personal best, 47:13.
-Went skinny dipping at a local state park with Rick.
-Deep sea fished with Rick. That fool is scared of live bait, HAHA.
-Took a walk on the wild side.
-Ate sushi.
-Did not protest Chick-fil-a.
-Grew and still have a mustache.
-Shook Jani Lane's hand. Lead singer for Warrant (for the fools that didn't know).
-Bought a Bluray player.

That's all I can think of for now, suckers. Check back later for more updates as I remember them.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Trash Talk With Donnie - The Free Truck

I hope our loyal readers haven't missed my little area of the blog since I haven't done one in a while. I decided to share the story on my basically free dump truck.

How many people can say they turned a 4 wheeler into a dump truck? A number of years ago I was given this old wore out 4 wheeler. Its about a 85 model yamaha moto4 2wd. It never needed a penny!  All it took was a carb adjusting every couple of months. Well it got to where I weren't using it anymore, so last summer I decided to try out my bartering skills on the craigslist.

A guy offered me a 1971 ford pickup, that ran and had a clean title, for a straight up trade. I snatched that deal up in a hurry. I put a carb on it that I had laying around and drove it for a few months. The trans slipped some, so instead of spending the money on a trans rebuild I sold it. Got $900 for the old gal and turned around and picked up the International dump truck for $700 the same day.

It came with a fully operational 8 yard bed, a freshly rebuilt 345 and 4 speed trans. All it needed was a new $125 battery and she was on the road and ready to go. Top speed is only about 45, but that's about all you'll be ables to handle with the bouncy steering. If you need any hauling in my neck of the woods, let me know!




Monday, April 2, 2012

Floyd's Mini-Horse Emporium for Children

GOOOOD MOOOORNING VIETNAAAM!!! I'm so excited this morning. I just got finished with the blueprints for my Mini-Horse Emporium. I'm still perfecting the plans and adding details so please feel free to comment with your suggestions. This is going to be the single greatest achievement I've achieved in my life so far. The blueprints are attached so please click on the picture for a bigger version so you can see it better. So far, I have built the fence around the mini horse houses, put gravel in the parking lot, and started digging out the swimming pond. My next big project I'm starting on is the Living Merry Go Round. I plan to put in old fashioned merry go round music and have the minis be connected to a center post they will walk around. The kids are going to eat it up!

In other news, my brand new babies (mini-horses), Snap, Crackle, and Pop are adjusting quite well to life at Chateau Floyd. My sis says I'm spoiling them but I think they deserve it. Crackle even weaseled his way into the kitchen the other day while I was making supper. Its so funny how they want to eat whatever I'm eating!

Monday, February 27, 2012

Restore America Now

WHAAAAZZZZ UUUUPPP MY NERDS!?!?!? Restore America Now.

This post has been way too long overdue. Dearest friends, I am truly sorry to keep you all waiting in suspense. It’s true; I have been busy on the Ron Paul Campaign Trail. I jumped on the trail no long after he passed through my neighboring state of New Hampshire back in November. It has been a whirlwind of a rollercoaster ride so far. I’m about to run out of trip fund money so I have to travel back home to Maine after this last visit to Virginia. I’m calling it quits on this trail. Restore America Now.

Today I am posting from the cold state of Michigan. I’ve been in Detroit for a few days now. Got here early so I could do a little sightseeing. This city is pretty cool. Saw an 8 mile sign yesterday. Tonight the Man will be giving a little speech at some performing arts center. Probably will be saying a few words I’ve already heard before. No matter how many times I hear him speak it never gets old. That man can preach it! He’s not as old as he looks. I swear he drinks 5 hour energy drinks for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. HAHA!! That man is the real deal. Restore America Now.

In case you’re asking yourself, no I do not go to every single Ron Paul event that he speaks or shows his beautiful face at. I merely hit the special events or cities that I really want to attend, but the whole purpose of my trip is to promote Ron “Dusty Bottoms” Paul. That’s what a few of us who have been touring with him refer to him as. Most recently I traveled from Arizona. That was my latest besides being here in Detroit. I’ve often thought that it would be so much easier if Dusty would hit these locations in some logical fashion. This jumping around across the country back and forth ain’t cheap. This is another reason I can’t hit every event he shows up to. Restore America Now.

My Arizona trip was amazing. I of course saw Paul speak at breakfast that was to die for. Those eggs benedicts knocked my socks off. Who knew you could do such amazing things with eggs. Talk about smack your momma good. Besides that awesome breakfast I was able to sneak away and take a peek at the Grand Canyon. We don’t have one of those in Maine, but holy smokes do we need one. Restore America Now.

Before we made it to Arizona I was in Idaho. Come to think of it, I didn’t even eat a baked potato while I was there. Hmm, maybe I should go back one day. Floyd, if you’re reading this, you up for an Idaho trip one day to get some potatoes? HAHAHA!! Maybe we could score some women like in the Myrtle Beach trip. That chick from Applebees. Restore America Now.

My other adventures, which I plan on sharing more of in future posts were as follows: (In no particular order)
• Minneapolis (That mall is huge!! So many beautiful women too)
• Las Vegas!! (What happens in vegas, stays in vegas ;))
• South Carolina (Been there done that state!!)
• Denver
• Reno (Bigger than I thought)
• Iowa
• New Hampshire
• Area 51
• Chicago (side trip for my own pleasure)
• Atlanta (just for fun. They have a Six Flags there!)
• Myrtle Beach (for old times sakes)

Yes, I did wash my clothes while on the road. Also, I did manage to make it back to Main about 3 or 4 times to refuel my batteries. Ron also made it to Maine. Gave me chill bumps. Restore America Now.

During my trips so far I’ve shook Ron’s hand 6 times, gave him 3 high fives, and accidentally gave him one hug. Some fat kid pushed me into him while we were in Minneapolis. It has been a life changing trip and one that I am proud of. I know where my vote will go. Being around Dusty makes me feel so much younger than I am. It’s a great feeling to know he’ll be our next president. Restore America Now.

One of the Ron Paul for 2012 signs that Jenny made.



One of the times that I came close to shaking Dusty's hand. I snaped a quick shot instead.



Mark and Jenny, two of these coolest Ron Paul supporters ever. They were just so delighful to be around. Hey Jenny, if you're reading this know I'd take you from Mark any day you'd let me. PS send some of those oatmeal cookies!!



Ted and I took a break from campaigning to visit the Grand Canyon.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Rocking Rookers 2.0!!!!!


GOOOOOOD MOOOOORNING VIETNAAAAM!!!!! I am super excited this morning because yesterday I started my very own facebook group. Whats it a group for you ask? Why, ROOK of course! I just got sick and tired of the negative energy that has been surrounding duelboard and Rocking Rookers lately (I won't say any names). After talking with some other rook lovers out there, they encouraged me to start my own group where positivity and open-mindedness is paramount.

Here is the link to the Facebook Group that was voted "Best New Group of 2012": Rocking Rookers 2.0
Anybody and everybody is welcome to join so please, come join the party!

In other news, this blog is about to get a crazy amount of new daily content so be prepared.

Also, Norm, if you are reading this, good luck on the Ron Paul campaign trail!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

RIP Fruity Pebbles

About a week ago, during the night, my barn barned with one of my horses inside. After posting some questions on Yahoo Answers seeking advice about horse shelter, I just couldn't leave them all in the cold every night so I have been putting one in the barn a night to warm up next to a space heater. No, I didn't have the heater near any straw, it was on the concrete slab in the corner. Pebbles must have dropped some straw near it or turned it over. I really need to figure out who made that heater so I can complain about their faulty product. Now I'm stuck with two horses with no shelter for them other than a tent pavilion thing I found at Wal-Mart. I could put one of them in the garage probably but I really hate the thick ice that covers my whole truck in the mornings. Not sure what to do at this point. Hopefully this isn't the end of the horse emporium journey. It probably would be if I wasn't so stubborn. My mom told me before she died that she wanted me to follow my dream of having a horse emporium and I mean to see it through. Wish me luck, blogosphere.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Welcome Back Floyd!

Thanks Floyd, its good to be back. I apologize to all the loyal readers for me being gone so long. Its been a rough fall. First I had to up and move to Montana then online rook went to pay only then my mom died. Bummer after bummer after bummer. Trying to keep my head up though. Before she died, my mom told me to follow my dream of having an actual successful horse ranch/emporium for handicapped children and elderly.

I've been so busy trying to acquire horses and animals that I haven't been able to do much else. Not having anything but a small shed on my property, I had to make due by making it into a small barn with enough room (barely) for one horse. I've also acquired three new horses, Sweet Bun, Benedict, and Fruity Pebbles. In the past week though, Sweet Bun was either stolen or ran away. Its okay though, trying to keep my head high. I've got plenty to be thankful for, three healthy horses, beautiful land, and since my mom passed, my ex-wife and I have been on speaking terms again. 2012, Floyd is ready for you.

Below is a pic of my barn, the first of many phases at the "Eleanor Brewer Memorial Handicapped Horse Emporium."